Who Says The Africans Are Illiterate

In Tanganyika an illiterate workman enlisted a professional letter-writer to plead with his employer who had just sacked him.

'Kind Sir, On opening this epistle you will behold the work of a de-jobbed person and a very be-wifed and much childrenised gentleman who was violently de-jobbed in a twinkling by your goodself.

For heavenís sake sir, consider this catastrophy on your own head, and remind yourself on walking home at the moonís end, to five savage wives and sixteen voracious children, with your pockets filled with nonexistent £. s. d. and a solitary sixpence. Pity my horrible state. As to the reason given by yourself esquire for my de-jobment, the incrimination was laziness.

No sir! It were impossible that myself which has pitched sixteen infant children into this vale of terror can have a lazy atom in his mortal frame, and the sudden departure of £7 has left me on the verge of destitution and despair. I hope this vision of horror will invade your dreams this night and the good angels will melt and pulverise your heart of mill-stones, so that you will awaken and, with such alacrity as may be compatible with your personal safety, will hasten to re-jobulate your servant.

So be it, Amen.

Yours despairingly,

BWANA TOMBA (Dar-es-Salaam).

++ The much de-jobbed and bewifed man was reinstated by his honourable employer.
(by Henry Smith Esq.)

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