Father Eric's 9 Drug Definitions

Does anyone remember Fr Eric's 9 Drug Definitions? In the second year it was deemed that learning this mantra would protect us from the burgeoning world of chemical abuse, promoted by such evil influences as the rock band famously announced by Dodo as Ged Lepplin in an assembly.

Anyway the drug definitions were ruthlessly forced into us by such means and threats as detentions etc. Finally one day only two remained who could not recite all ten, JN & JD. As the two class hardmen they took a certain pride in standing up to the establishment. After failing to answer ANY of the questions correctly they were invited to the head of the class, where upon Fr Eric whisked a cane from his surplice, dress, whatever and proceeded to give JD six of the best in front of the assembled class. I can still see the determined stare amid the tears in his eyes as he eyeballed Fr Eric.

JN was next, also giving his best stare he grinned at Fr Eric who infuriated at this proceeded to splinter the cane over his hand on the first stroke.

The solemnity of the proceedings evaporated when Fr Eric attempted to re-insert the now splintered cane back into the secret pocket it had come from. After finally sliding it in, the cane was lifting the front of his surplice as though he had a giant hard-on. Leaving the class rolling on the floor in mirth, two sore pupils were thus elevated to superstars. Bearing in mind this was 1978 the public caning had a profound effect on us. Not least when a month later Paddy Ruane lost his rag with a pupil and proceeded to literally kick the s**t out of the guy on the floor. Luckily for us it wasn't a Protestant school.

Drug Definitions

  1. A drug is a chemical which affects us mentally or physically.
  2. A drug addict is one who has come to depend upon a drug in his daily life, and who has an overpowering desire for its continuance, though it is not required for the relief of organic disease.
  3. Drug Dependence is a severe state of intoxication caused by the repeated and continual use of a drug.
  4. Physical Dependence is the condition produced in the body whereby chemical changes due to a drug make the body depend on that drug.
  5. Psychological dependence is a mental urge, which requires periodic or frequent administration of the drug for pleasure or to avoid discomfort.
  6. Withdrawal symptoms are the physical or mental disturbances produced when a person stops taking a drug.
  7. Tolerance is the adjustment of the body to a drug, so that larger and larger doses must be taken to achieve the same effect.
  8. Hallucinations are imaginary sensations, visions and sounds.
  9. Hallucinogens are drugs that produce hallucinations.
Quite naive really, I suppose the consequence of having a priest teach us about sex, drugs & marriage. Still the later definitions of drug and alcohol are very clinical, I suppose this is why so many researched the accuracy of this part of our education whilst in the Vl college!
(Declan Galvin 76-81)

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